Gandoleering: Beware of what is Fake

gandoleering
Originally uploaded by rsplund.

The Onion is to newspapers what The Daily Show is to television news. Complete with fictitious headlines, stories, leads, and yes, even horoscopes. In the latest edition of The Onion, myself and the rest of the rams were advised to throw down our straw hats, take off our striped shirts, drown our oars and shave our mustaches! AKA give up gandoleering forever. So since I don't live in Venice and I couldn't grow a mustache if my life depended on it, I thought nothing of it. In fact, the very next day I scheduled a pedal boat voyage with four gents on a man-made lake no more than four feet deep. As we pedaled, we got hot and all decided to take off our shirts. In the craziness, I dropped my keys in the lake. It ruined our collective day. Once we peddled back in, the head 16-year-old at the pedal boat shack let me borrow the bolt cutters so we could unlock our bikes from the rack. John Stewart keeps calling it fake news but I'll be damned if it's not having a real effect.